New Dentist Experiences Hate Crime

MUNICE, INDIANA—Recent dental school graduate Michael McIntyre was shocked and appalled by a malevolent comment made about his profession.

“I just don’t know how it could have happened,” he said. “I’ve never met this woman in my life. She doesn’t know anything about me. Or at least no more than the generic and overly confident biography that we put in the paper mentioned.”

He went on, “I went into the operatory to introduce myself like I have been ever since I started working at Dr. Avery’s office. Then it happened.”

Dr. McIntyre then paused, shaken in his recounting of the story. A few deep breaths later, he continued.

“She looked up at me with a blank look on her face and said, ‘no offense, Doc. But I hate dentists.'”

Then Dr. McIntyre went quiet, all the color leaving his face. Victim of an unfounded hatred so common to dentists nationwide.

When asked for comment, Dr. Steve Avery, owner of the practice where Dr. McIntyre is employed said, “give me a break. I hear that stupid line every single week. Mike just started here on Tuesday, so maybe he’s never heard it before but he better get some backbone pretty quick. Patients are pretty awful sometimes. It’s time to suck it up, Cupcake.”